So, the wife, the kid, and not the dogs, and I are headed over to Florida to spend Thanksgiving with my parents, my sister, and my 94 year old grandmother. There is part of me that wanted to jet off to the Kennel Club and play some No limit Texas Hold'em in Pensacola and see how things are and get a taste of that live action. I believe the offer cash games and maybe Sit'n go tournaments. But every time I hear about the "sit 'n go" tournaments they are never spreading them. I think this is an antique from the old Florida laws to get around buy-in caps, but I'm not sure.
Only problem time is extremely compressed, and because of obligations we were already cutting our trip short.
First off, with little fanfare I did the mustache Mo-vemeber thing. Yes. I know what you are thinking, and yes, I will provide photo-evidence. Here's why, I got this email from my cousin:
Almost three years ago, I made a promise to my father, who carries a diagnosis of metastatic prostate cancer that as long as he was alive, I would grow my mustache out for the month of MOvember. He has already outlived many dire predictions of various oncologists. Maybe my mustache has nothing to do with this.... but a MAN keeps his word. Last year I donated my Salt Lake City mustache contest prize money to prostate cancer research.
This year... I planned to suffer in silence. Friends (mere boys) are looking for jobs, wives, respect... The excuses are flying all around me. Unlike The Mayor, my heart is easily swayed... I planned to let them off the hook. I didn't want to pull them down with me. But I personally cannot be deterred from my crusade.
However, I have been approached by multiple inspired MEN. MEN who want to support my father, MEN who want to look like cops, porn stars, firemen, race car drivers, or Tom Seleck. Simply MEN who want to feel like MEN for the month of November.
Yes Darren and Joel, I am worried that you all were hoping that if no one brought this up... MOvember would slip quietly by... no one the wiser. Let's face it... It might not be as hip as it was last year. But this is no fad!!! As the reigning KING I am obligated to bring the pain!
SO I THROW DOWN THE GAUNTLET ---- RIGHT NOW!!!!
RULES ARE SIMPLE --
1. Start growing it now (I took a one week head start as home court advantage), if you are a habitual grower -- shave it off and start over
2. NOTHING BELOW the UPPER LIP -- this is about traditional suffering -- a MAN takes the pain this month -- no gorgeous goatees, no hip handle bars, no sexy soul patches, no lovely lamb chops, NOTHING metro, dressed up, or even remotely resembling a new fangled Justin Timberlake connecty thing.
3. $15 dollar entry fee to become a real MAN for a month
4. The pot goes to a "KING" judged at a contest/party at my house on December 11th (or December 4th if Sharon doesn't make me go to Texas that weekend). The vote will be secret ballot, polling the crowd. And we will go to the bar "Thruster's" -- en masse around 10:30pm -- and the KING may, at his option, wear his crown. The KING is free to spend the money has he pleases -- but a small donation to the charity would be cool.
-Letter to be continued in the next post...