Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Rounders Part II

COSTA RICA ONLINE GAMBLING FLICK TO STAR LEONARDO DiCAPRIO. The guys who wrote Rounders are turning their sights to the online... sites. Expect veiled references to the Absolute(ly Cheating You) Poker Scandal. We can see the pitch now, Blow meets Magic the Gathering meets the Firm meets Shade meets bad sequel of your choice that's not technically a sequel but we all know it is... ie Charles in Charge. Speaking of sequels why not just get Matt Damon and Ed Norton and make it an honest to goodness sequel.

Here's our sequel: Worm worms his way into a online site's strip mall in Costa Rica's offices, where he coincidentally is hiding out after trying to tap into hole camara feeds. He is about to get roughed up but promises access to Mike McD. The execs are Spencer Pratt lookalike (odd flesh color beards not required) frat boys that started an internet poker site by teaming up with old hustler named Huss Ramilton played by John Goodman.

They'll include a shot of them shooting a goose that lays a golden egg when they decide to steal from their own customers despite making millions of dollars a day. Worm coming up with the idea is likely.

McD, now a name multiple bracelet winner (again, not an anonymous one), against his better judgment decides to wear Worm's company's patch to bail out his friend one more time when Huss Ramilton applies the screws. Then chaos ensues as the scandal breaks and McD, the new face of the site, and Worm the dimwitted idea guy become the fall guys. With his bankroll completely virtual and his name disgraced Mike McD loses everything overnight as all the sites block him from withdrawing funds.

In a race against time, McD must win enough to fund the trip to Costa Rica to clear his name, the bribery money for local officials and a bracelet he promised to a handicapped kid (played by Daniel Negreanu in a touching cameo) that is the only person that still believes in him.

With the aid of messageboard buddies (okay, the handicapped kid ain't they only one) they follow the Oreo cookie crumb thread on the internet (which is on computers these days) to do so. Some angry Russians led by Teddy KGB who had already hacked the site and cheating on it but weren't dumb enough to be superusers with outlier obviousness arrive at Costa Rica at the same time. Mike McD busts Huss Ramilton AND clears Worm's name with the Ruskies. The new owners of the site? Teddy KGB and his entourage. And that's your movie. Come on... it's better than Lucky You, okay... it's better than Ishtar.

www.gulfcoastpoker.net


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