Sleep With the Fishes, Dine on the Whales

You ever get that guy at the table that you just want to spank. Just bend him over your knee and through brute force induce some common sense into him and his game. "Don't cold call, no pair no draw." "Don't say you got a feeling it was going to go spade-spade." You look at that guy, always with athe sad-sack face contrasted by a I'm- indestructible-on-this-rush-smile and your knuckles start throbbing. It's like your saliva glands start firing in advance of a good meal you can smell heading to your table, but this guy just casues your hands to brace for the beatdown you want to lay on the guy. I'm not a violent guy but I swear I've looked down at my knuckles swelling with blood in anticipation of some sort of subconcious primal urge fullfillment when I sit with these types. His mere presence is tilting. He stumbles through hands and yet the chips are drawn to him like flies to a decomposing corpse. And yes, that's the image you ...

I busted out of the $300 Coushatta event around the 60s. Paid 20. Weird day. Early on, the table was passive and I gobbled up some chips just being aggressive. Then I got into some hands where my opponents let me draw cheaply and for once, I hit them. A high flush got paid off by a king high flush. That kind of stuff. In one stretch I was betting any unopened pot with little more than min-raises and not getting any action. But chipping up and up. Got into a big hand with a guy on the button. I'd describe him as older but everybody there was older so that doesn't help. I bet out with AQ. He smooths. AQ, is definitely a trouble hand recently for me. Flop comes out 10109. I check. He bets. I don't have a tell, but I have a feel that he doesn't have anything. Probably a subconscious tell. I listen to my gut and call. The turn is an 8. I check, he bets leaving about half his starting stack left. I call. The river is a brick. I think he's going to stop bl...

Coushatta runs a pretty sweet mega satellite. You win and you win a seat into every one of the their tournaments. The 7 Clans tournament. Played today. Didn't really get any hands. Won a coin flip early when I got a little out of control with a10 v. 88 had to call his shove when I tried to take down the lippers from the small blind and he woke up with a hand in the big blind. I also caught AA (only pair over sixes today) and tripled up after I bluffed off most of my chips early. Then I just steadily chipped up and kept getting involved in bad timing. Made a huge laydown when I checked in the dark and flopped top two 87. Unfortunately, the other four players also checked. The turn is a 10. I fire out a big bet. Guy calls for almost his whole stack (yeah... why not shove... I don't know but his story gets worse). Then the button shoves all in. Errrr. I stew. He's barely got me covered and I would still have plenty of chips left if I fold. I kept going over hand...

It actually makes it two days ago. The morning before the positive outcomes in the two rivalry games, I played in the Harrahs tournament. I endured a crazy morning of swings and finally became "THAT" guy, I'm always so jealous of. Though in retrospect it comes with a bit of a cavaet. Usually, when the money got in I'd get outflopped and then I'd catch up. So, even though I'd win the hand after a wild set of cards I wasn't just throwing money in bad and being a card rack. So, I start out early being patient through the first couple of levels. I'd get in cheap and I was making hands. I hand 910 suited in late position. Flopped a boat. Somehow a guy with K9 (board 9910), didn't get felted to me. Well played by him. Poorly played by me. The one overpair I got all day was Kings. We had a couple of short stacks and I saw one like his cards and look at his chips. I limped, got another limper and that guy shoved. Around to me I called, middle...

Was looking forward to the rivalry double-header last night. UNC-Dook and USA-Mexico. The right team won both games. It's crazy, our biggest national rival in team sports is in a sport most people don't know about or care about. Our games with Mexico are as fierce as any event with the Russians used to be. The Mexican players hate us, their fans despise us, the entire country went out and bought voodoo dolls that were supposed to look like Landon Donovan (they screwed up the number, it's 10 not 01 genuises), and the hatred bubbles over into the game. People think soccer is a fairy sport just need to look at the montage of cheap shots the Mexican players have taken against Uncle Sam over the last decade and a half. Rafa Marquez head butted Cobi Jones in the world cup and last night he went studs first into our goal keeper Tim Howard. Go to the around the 5:05 part in the below video to add a new sports villian for you to hate. Howard is one of the few Americans in th...

I want to echo Jason Lipscomb's thoughts and let Monkey know we are thinking about him and Squirrel right now. We know they'll make it through this dark time. Also, a shout out to the Tiltin' Texan in Houston for the next few weeks. Said he'll be battling online and our thoughts are with him too. I know Gene D will keep his head up after bubbling his final tournament in Vegas. Guy went deep everyday and is knocking on the door. Thought he did a great job on the radio segment we did as well. Speaking of the show, very happy with how it went. The show is broadcast in Bay St. Louis and Baton Rouge. You can stream the KKAY feed from the Baton Rouge station off the internet. Might turn into a weekly segment or something like that. The first go round was mostly an introduction. We hope to get our bloggers on there too, as guests, if they are interested. Upset I missed the 20k guarantee at the Beau on Saturday. Was looking to play but my wife didn't feel good, so I stayed ...

I don't play well with others so instead of posting this on Facebook I am putting it here. After I'm done I'll "tag" others to put their lists up. You can do it anywhere that I can read it. 1. I have a fetish. Two words: bingo wings. My wife unfortunately has none. Seeing a documentry about Indian guys that hang weights from their... you know whats I asked if I could clip barbells to the flesh under her upper arms. Because she declined I've been force feeding her donuts and pulling at her triceps when she's been sleeping. 2. I want to fondly recall a memory of my first pet so anybody can hack all my accounts by answering the security question correctly. I'll do so now Boss Hogg Tweetledick was an awesome parrot who would only mimic the whining of my cat. In case anybody is curious my social security number is 227-69-0210. And I'll randomly mention that when chosing passwords I use anniversarys with underscores between the numbers. My favorite a...

Headed up to the saturday tournament at the IP. Big Smoove and I planned out a day of tournament action but his littlest one got sick so I went solo. The plan was threefold play some small buy-ins at the IP, the Isle of Capris or Hard Rock, and then check out the Island View at six. I got about 1/3rd through the plan and bailed--ie I played one and went home. Not much to say. I started out on a table of alternates and basically blinded away 1/5th of my stack. Lots of novices splashing around with weak hands. I figured out who I could steal from but was never first into the pot. It's charming to see inexperienced players trying to play correctly but not quite doing it. Yes, they get that aggression is important but applying it is often a problem. They'd make min raises on draw heavy boards, or flop the stone cold nuts like AJ and hit AAJ and go all-in. Their opponent folds and they show their hand proudly. Yes, you essentially had all the outs you can't get paid th...